


Halycon Days Journal

by Forlorn_Storyteller



Series: Unsealing Legacy Universe [2]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Gen, Naruto is Just Naruto, Ninja cooking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-23
Updated: 2016-04-10
Packaged: 2018-05-15 17:01:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5792674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Forlorn_Storyteller/pseuds/Forlorn_Storyteller
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Naruto, Itachi, and Shisui spending relatively blissful days when they're not plotting world peace.<br/>Includes... <br/>Sealmaster's workshop disaster... <br/>Itachi being crazy doting brother<br/>and Shisui being Shisui... <br/>Together they're apparently capable to spend days without anything sort of political disaster going. Sometimes...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Naruto is not Ryouri-nin, but Shisui is not listening...

**Author's Note:**

> In short series or random one-shots featuring 'Team Murphy' or my Unsealing Legacy...   
> Or where I dump omakes or discarded plots... whichever...

Hunting was one of those skills most shinobi learned naturally, if you could capture your enemy a wild game was a much easier to catch. Not to mention after a century since the founding of Shinobi village, hyorogan or food pill never improved in taste –for practical reason of taste equal smell- so when there was no risk of lighting fire Shinobi would hunt their food.

“Whoa, I found a flock of Pheasant!” Shisui used his sharingan –it had better range than normal eyes but nothing on byakugan- as replacement of binocular to observe their prey. “Those birds are super tasty!”

Naruto who was sitting on the branch below the one Shisui occupied with Itachi sighed loudly. “I am glad _at last_ you find something you like to eat, so far you have turned down venison and rabbit…” Simply because it was troublesome to butcher a deer, and they already ate rabbit in previous mission.

Itachi sighed too, nursing his temple. “Can’t we just eat food pill?” It would save time, and even though Naruto finished his mission for local noble early didn’t mean Shisui should waste their time just because he wanted to eat something different.

“Blasphemy! We have finished our mission and peasant are rare in Hi no Kuni! We’re in Tori no Kuni for god sake!” However there was no village nearby so rather than not trying to eat exotic dish, Shisui wanted to hunt the peasant and cooked it themselves. "Beside we have Naruto, the amazing Ryouri-nin in our midst." 

Ryouri-nin was the latest 'new role' started by Moyagakure which rather than revolutionary idea was becoming another joke stock coming from -hidden village no one acknowledge as hidden village- because of obvious reason that bringing a chef -ninja trained or not- was not the brightest idea when their proffession was mainly dealing in infiltration and espionage. Stealth and cooking didn't mix. No one was surprised when Moyagakure screwed themselves with their newest idiotic idea in the most spectacular way. In betting pot most Shinobi bet on the cooking get Moyagakure nin killed because the smell and smoke was tracked by enemy ninja. No one expected the screw up was obesity problem because the food their Ryouri-nin cook was too delicious. 

"Not worried you're going to be fat like Moyagakure-nin?" Naruto joked.

Shisui patted his flat stomach, "Don't worry, the perk of fire natured Shinobi is we burn fat faster than most."

Naruto and Itachi shared a look. "I am sure I have never heard of that." Itachi murmured.

The blond shrugged, “Hai… hai… go catch your bird, but clean them yourself.” Naruto made shooing motion with his hand.

Shisui grinned before he shushined away. It didn’t take long for Naruto’s enhanced hearing to catch clucking sound and screeching. Shisui reappeared, holding three colorful birds by their legs. Belatedly Naruto noted one of it was dull grey, a hen.

He was almost surprised Shisui didn’t cook them on the spot with Goukakyuu, all the feather and plumage were intact. “Hm… seems like a waste to eat these pretty looking birds.” Naruto couldn’t help but comment.

Shisui being Shisuu ignored his comment and jumped down to the ground. Using water from water storing seal, Shisui began to butcher his hunt. There were so many feathers flying and screech of dying birds. Naruto caught an errand feather, or rather a long plumage of pheasant and contemplated whether it could be a good writing tools like what he heard from merchants they escorted last mission. 

Shisui jumped back to his previous perch and presented his work, a bundle of pinkish white meat that looked like chicken meat. “Roast them for me please.”

Naruto gave him a look, "I am not a Ryouri-nin, you know that right?" Looking at Shisui’s determined look there was no way to change his mind. “Alright… then prepare the fire, and Itachi help me to look for some cooking herb around here.”    

“Yay!”

Naruto never cooked this bird before but it was a ‘game bird’ so supposedly it had less fat than other meat. So it was easier to dry out when roasted. So he coated the meat so it won't dry as easily when cooked, sprinkled some spice and let the meat browning. “Like this I guess?”

“Aren’t you a supreme chef, Naruto?” Shisui grinned at him, mouth watering at the sweet smell. 

His left eye twitched, “I never cook this kind of meat, when hunting I usually go for rabbit and deer.” The more common prey for most Shinobi on the field, they hunted bird game but rarely. “And who is supreme? You live off from take-outs so of course you think my sub-par cooking is good.”

Neither Itachi nor Shisui had a heart to tell Naruto he already passed ‘sub-par’ long ago and these days he could win against most housewives in cooking. Especially after one time he cooked too much and shared the dish with Shiomitsu and Uchiha cousins, Yuzuriha was still depressed she lost in cooking from Naruto. The blond still didn't catch up on that yet. 

Well, if passing comment on Kushina-san his mother made was true, that was another talent Naruto inherited from the red head.

“Hey! I also live off of Mikoto-baasan’s cooking and yours.” Shisui pointed out indignantly.

The twitch increased, “Why did you sound so proud of that? Learn how to cook simple meal at least!” He snarled before he returned to his cooking, eyeing the browned meat almost warily. “Like this maybe?” Naruto wondered out loud as he used one of many spare calligraphy brushes he had to coat the meat with some sort of sauce on top of the spice.

Shisui blinked, “What did you put there?”

“Hm? Some sour berry Itachi picked mixed with honey…” He answered.

“Where did you get honey from?”

“I brought some with me… it’s very good to tenderize meat.” Naruto grabbed the roasted meat on stick. “Yup… looks nice.” He handed two sticks to Itachi and Shisui. “Dig in… hopefully it doesn’t taste weird.”

Far from weird, it was heavenly. “I am so… lucky my teammate is a good cook!”

"So you're seriously demoting me to Ryouri-nin?" 


	2. In which Naruto learns Itachi's crazy brother side and laments...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember Sasuke's Paw prints encyclopedia? Well, this is the behind the scene where Itachi drag Naruto to it.  
> When I watch the episode I couldn't help but wonder what the heck Itachi was thinking and how did he know all of that cats from?

Naruto didn’t know much about Itachi’s little brother he only heard in passing, even though once upon a time they had been in academy in the same time in different year. Considering the year Sasuke entered academy was when he was working his ass off for apprenticeship program, it was no wonder he didn’t notice Itachi’s little me around. Sasuke was older by two months than Naruto. He also remembered seeing a vision of baby Sasuke and his mother baby-talking him.

Something about being classmates, that never happened because he graduated before Sasuke could be in the same class with him. Maybe they could be friends like his mother hoped but not exactly like she imagined.

What he knew about Uchiha Sasuke was basically these.

Sasuke worship Itachi to disturbing level, and according to Shisui, Itachi’s protectiveness of Sasuke was borderline unhealthy. Which Naruto waved off because overprotectiveness towards one’s little brother was pretty normal in comparison of say… Maito Gai’s quirks.

Sasuke was the top of his class, just like Itachi. He was a pretty hyper child before he entered academy, he was calmer now. Which mean the kid calmed down after he was smothered by expectation as Itachi’s little brother?

His favorite food is tomato and onigiri.

So he was a training loving kid who liked food that easily consumed on training and packed enough calorie and protein. The tomato? Maybe Sasuke genuinely like the red fruit, but Naruto didn’t put it pass the Uchiha to get the child to develop a taste for it. It was good for their eyes; with lycopene and vitamin C were good to protect their ocular tissues.

“T&I would kill to get you, I think.” Shisui said, staring wide eyedly at him. “I still don’t get the logic around Sasuke’s manipulated taste for tomato though.”

Naruto rolled his eyes, “The kid seems set to follow Itachi’s footstep, and yet he dislike sweets unlike Itachi and like tomato instead? Contrary to popular belief, it’s easy to manipulate development of taste in a child.” He was pretty sure his love for ramen was not genetic, but because when he was hungry, and it rained back then… Teuchi-san had served a bowl of warm ramen for him and didn’t care about his status.

Since then he identified taste of ramen as comfort and acceptance.

“Let’s see… does someone used to give sweets to Itachi when he was small? Someone he really likes?” Naruto hazarded a guess.

Shisui nodded, “Cousin Obito did… he seems to always have candy on him. He got lots from elders he helped around Konoha, and he made it his life mission to corrupt us with it. You know… give some sun and sweets in our dreary Uchiha life, he said…”

That was one very familiar name… oh right, Tou-san’s Uchiha student. Obito had already passed away and not around to corrupt Sasuke. If not for Obito, he was sure Itachi would keep cherry tomato in his food storage scroll instead of dango. He was not sure he should thank Obito or cursed him for Itachi’s unhealthy eating habit.

“I guess Obito-nii’s death is also why Itachi is a bit…” He trailed off unsurely, “Towards Sasuke… you see, Sasuke is a bit like Obito. A hyper kid… thirsting for recognition and not as good as Itachi…”

Naruto sighed, “Oh come on… getting overprotective over someone is pretty normal, we will get Itachi on the right track if he is suffocating his little brother with it.”

Shisui gave him a look. “One of these days… you will see Itachi’s crazy brother side.”

Naruto snorted, it couldn’t be worse than how Itachi treated him.

Few months later Naruto severely regret underestimating Itachi’s crazy brother side. Shisui was not even with him to suffer together. It was an errand mission to Sora-ku on behalf of Uchiha clan, and since it was his day off he came along with Itachi. After all Sora-ku was inhabited by a group of black marketeers who sell any weapons that have been banned everywhere else. All business ran in this seemingly abandoned city also sold rare items.

Naruto was more interested in finding his clan’s relic in this city than Uchiha clan’s supplier though. No offense to Neko-baa, but Shiomitsu’s work was grades above everything she displayed in her humble little shop.

“A blond Uzumaki…” Neko-baa couldn’t resist pointing out at the sight of his clan’s crest and sun like hair.

He just smiled in return, bending his waist to respectful bow like expected of the heir from strong and ancient clan. “It’s a pleasure to meet you; I am Naruto from Uzumaki clan.”

Neko-baa hummed, nodding approvingly. “An Uzumaki, a curious choice of friend for an Uchiha to be honest... and this particular Uzumaki to boot.”

He didn’t feel hostility just plain curiosity from the cat like grandma so he just shrugged. Itachi glanced at him, silently gauging his respond to Neko-baa’s words. “We’re friends… it just happen.”

She nodded sagely, not prodding further. “So the usual, Itachi?”

The Uchiha nodded. “Yes, put our supplies inside the storage scroll as usual.” Then he added. “And one more thing, it’s about Sasuke’s paw prints collection.”

Naruto didn’t know why but for some reason his well-honed instinct rang an alarm at the seemingly innocent and funny name. “Paw prints?”

Neko-baa laughed softly, “Ah yes… we make a book out of it!” Then she called someone by the name Tamaki to come with the said book. “Bring me the Paw Print Encyclopedia!”

Then a brunette girl around his age came with a thick pink book in hand, then at the sight of him and Itachi she blushed as pink as the book. Naruto inwardly sighed, _‘One of these days… the girls should look further than our looks.’_ Though to be fair, while he wasn’t vain he was explicitly instructed by Ieyasu to care about his appearance. He couldn’t deny looks was important, especially when it could be used to his advantage.

It was amazing how generous and agreeable clients from highborn society became when faced by pretty face.

The next thing he knew the pink book was handed to him by the blushing girl. It seemed she decided she liked him better than Itachi. Why? Oh… he returned her smile on reflex it seemed. “Ah, thank you. Tamaki-chan… ne?” It was not him who asked for the book though.

“Hai! Nice to meet you, etto…”

He was about to tell her his name when Neko-baa interjected. “He is Naruto of Uzumaki clan, a clan heir just like Itachi so watch your manner Tamaki.”

Tamaki flailed at the warning. “Ah… yes, it’s an honor to meet you! Naruto-sama.”

Naruto resisted his urge to look at Neko-baa who had not been _that_ respectful herself. “Just Naruto is fine.”

She beamed at him. “Hai!”

Damn, wrong move. Turning his attention from Tamaki he raised an unamused eyebrow at Itachi. “So… paw prints?”

Itachi accepted the book and flipped it open, showing Naruto a series of cat’s paw print in red ink. From the first page the size became progressively bigger. “Sasuke was a very restless child, he threw a tantrum when I was doing my errand so I made a game to keep him occupied.”

“A game where your brother collects cat’s paw prints?”

Itachi sounded very proud, “The fastest and notorious ones… he stopped when he entered academy but I think since he is ahead of his peers. It would be good if I give him some challenge, so I came here to check how far he was the last time we played this game.”

Naruto crossed his arms, “For a little kid’s game you take this very seriously.” He commented.

The Uchiha heir nodded, more to himself than to Naruto. “I got it… so here.” He said as he passed Naruto a sketchbook.

Naruto eyed the sketchbook in confusion. “Why you pass me a sketchbook?” It was quite small too, around the quarter of size Sai usually used for his artwork.

“I need your help to sketch cats.”  

The jinchuuriki blinked owlishly in confusion, drawing skill was one of many minor skills seal master develop naturally in their profession. With calligraphy came good hand coordination and you couldn’t just compile good research note only with writings, but also images. So yes, he could draw well even though he was not an artist like Sai.

“What for?”

“I am making cat bingo book for Sasuke’s hunt.”

That should clued Naruto in that Itachi was never right on the head, and suffered massive both IQ and EQ drop when Sasuke was concerned.

* * *

 

**Few Hours Later…**

Their first catch was a particularly nasty stray cat that was bigger than usual, according to Itachi it was a notorious offspring of nin-neko. It was napping so they just had to be silent to get a rough sketch on the cat, and listing down its distinctive characteristic. Like human version of bingo book, they even came up with silly nicknames.

The third one was pretty harmless, in Ninja’s hand at least. Naruto was starting to get suspicious since they were not in town but in the forest. The cat had a long body with short legs and tail, and unusual body structure aside… the brown coat was equally unusual.

_‘We’re already pass stray cat levels…’_

It was not until the sixth one Naruto opened his mouth. “Itachi…” Naruto eyed the poor animal that was caught by Itachi’s shinobi wire. It was impressive how many cats they found in short time, prodigy or not.

“Hm?”

Naruto pointed at it, “This is _not_ a cat.”

“She is.” Itachi insisted, at some point he noticed the ‘cat’ was female.

Why they were arguing about this again? “Last time I checked a cat is not bigger than I am!” Naruto shouted, pointing at the whimpering tiger like giant cat. “And while I am not a cat expert I am sure as hell this is a tiger!”

Of course… Naruto’s protest went unheeded as Itachi dragged him to the next cat. Which Naruto identified as a leopard, and Itachi still called it a cat. Well, it belonged to feline family so maybe Itachi was not so wrong.

Or so he thought.

“Itachi… I am getting very tired protesting you but are you sure it’s alright to set this _cat_ on your brother?” He pointed below at the lion with cord like hair he was standing on. It was very quiet after he tied it up with his chain, like it was resigned to its fate.

Itachi nodded, his voice was firm and confident. “Sasuke can handle it.”

“If he is around my height, this cat is ten times bigger than Sasuke.” Naruto pointed out.

“Actually… he is smaller than you, but I believe Sasuke can handle it.” Itachi’s trust on his brother’s ability was unwavering.

The seal master’s left eye twitched, “Then nope, he can’t. Unless he has access to convenient chain to restrain this _cat_ as Shinobi wire is not going to cut it.” Naruto pointed out. The cat had snapped Itachi’s wire trap apart, which was why Naruto was the one who restrained the cat. They could knock the cat down of course but it won’t be a harmless procedure because of its thick cord like mane.

Itachi nodded again, “Then I will recommend Sasuke to bring chains with him.”

Naruto face-palmed. “Itachi… that’s not what I mean...”

That was the last cat on the bingo book, and Naruto foolishly hoped the insanity ended for the day. Since they got eight cats on the list, Itachi wanted to add two more cats to make it ten for who knows why… why it had to be ten? There was nothing wrong with eight.

Naruto groaned, he thought that now they were back to Neko-baa’s shop they were done. Then again he was always game for another misadventure with Itachi and asked where they headed next, Itachi told him they didn’t need to look for the cat. It would be easy to recognize the two cats Itachi had in mind for his challenge.

The bad feeling increased by threefold when Itachi half-jokingly said, **_because he couldn’t be serious_** , there was only one cat shrouded in blue flame in the world.

And Kurama knew this cat. To be exact the cat Itachi had in mind was Kurama’s little sister, Nibi no Nekomata.

**_“What do you know… the weasel is as crazy as the rest of his clan, Nibi is not even a cat. He does know we just looks like animal but we’re not animal, doesn’t he?”_** Kurama sounded astonished, he had been laughing on the back of Naruto’s mind since the beginning and now he was on the same page as Naruto.

Naruto grabbed Itachi’s shoulders, silently thankful their height was not that far apart he could manhandle Itachi now. Because Itachi needed a good shake, so he would wake up from this Sasuke induced craziness. “Itachi… Matatabi you see.” He would call them by name when he could get away with it in Itachi’s presence. “She is as much as a cat as Kurama is a fox…” Itachi blinked at him. “She is _not_ a cat, she just _looks_ like one… flaming or not.”

“Is that so?” Itachi cocked his head to the side. “I see.”

On second thought, maybe Itachi was not that picky whether or not the target was a ‘real’ cat or not. “I don’t think she can give paw prints without burning the paper.” Naruto pointed out logically.

“We won’t know before trying.” Itachi said seriously.

In different circumstances Naruto would agree with Itachi in a heartbeat, but not in this. Naruto contemplated for a moment whether or not he should punch Itachi, funny how he thought only Shisui needed a whack on the head on occasion before. “You do realize if your brother is as stubborn as you are, this can escalate to international incident, right?” With freaking Kumogakure of all village, the last time that happened it didn’t end well for both Konoha and Kumo.

Neko-baa laughed at them, “Good luck convincing Itachi when it involves Sasuke!” She crowed.

Respect to elders be damned, “You’re not helping!” He hissed.

“I see how you’re good friends with Itachi… you keep him out of trouble.” She nodded sagely, an approving glint in her slit like eyes.

“Ha ha ha no~ the trend nowadays is good friends get in trouble _together_.” Naruto corrected her. “So I am keeping _us_ out of trouble…” Then he turned his attention back to Itachi. “You know what? Can’t we change it to Kurama’s? At least I am sure Kurama won’t roast your brother and there wouldn’t be any international pain later.” Maybe tried to step on him but Naruto was sure he could get Kurama to behave.

**“I don’t even look like a cat… and why should I join Uchiha’s game?!”** He protested.

“Kurama-san is not a cat.” Itachi pointed out.

“Neither is Matatabi!” Naruto retorted, he was about to argue some more but realized this was getting nowhere. “Alright… write Matatabi down, she is in Kumo anyway.” What was the chance a jinchuuriki wandered to Konoha’s territory anyway? Kumo guarded their jinchuuriki jealously.

Making a biiju’s paw print was one funny business, maybe Nii Yugito wouldn’t mind. At least the worst cat on the list was…

“Wait Itachi… there is one more cat, please don’t tell me it’s worse than Matatabi.” He was pretty sure there was no cat, or anything shaped like a cat that could be worse than Matatabi.

Itachi shook his head, “I am sure he is not as bad, I am thinking of Nekomata, the boss of nin-neko.”

Image of giant toad summon flashed on his mind. If it was boss of cat ninja, most likely it was on Gamabunta’s level. “I see… so is it a cat that will give his paw print if we ask nicely?”

“That’s impossible, nyaa~” One of two nin-neko that was watching their drama mewed. It was brown colored in two shades with kanji shinobi in his forehead. “For a cat to get their paw print taken is extremely embarrassing.”

The other nin-neko was the same size, a female tabby. “It’s equivalent to stripped naked and photographed to human, nyaa~”

It took a while for Naruto to compute what Denka and Hina told him. Wasn’t that mean getting their paw print taken was like a sexual harassment to these cats?

Naruto loved animals, especially furry ones like dogs and cats. There was a good reason he came to like Kurama very quickly, never mind Kurama was forty feet high and not cute. So it sounded like a crime to harass the cat to the point the embarrassment was equal to taking nude photo, not to mention today they… spied on these innocents cats so little Sasuke would chase and harass them for paw prints.

This resulted to an impressive crash on his mind. Neko-baa and her cats waited for the fireworks to start, it was not every day you saw an Uzumaki on the receiving end of crazy. Uchiha’s crazy to boot.

The Uzumaki inhaled sharply and the cat family wisely covered their ears. “ **ITACHI! WHAT DID YOU MAKE YOUR BROTHER DO TO INNOCENT CATS?!”**

It was also not every day, they saw the Uchiha prodigy fell on his butt and shaken back and forth by his Uzumaki friend. The blond Uzumaki was ranting about decency, moral and animal cruelty, but as everything else related to his brother it went over his head.

Neko-baa exhaled a puff of smoke and watched the two with a cat like grin on her face. Itachi had found a good friend and she was happy for him. The boy seemed to be a good one to keep Itachi grounded to boot. Though he was like a mother hen too towards Itachi.

A week later Itachi returned to borrow cat-ears headband, with resigned looking Uzumaki in tow. Neko-baa rubbed her hands together for another round of comedic drama. But first…   
The look on Uzumaki’s face when she handed him the cute cat ears was priceless.

“I can’t believe we’re really going to do this… Shisui you bastard, he ran away.” The Uzumaki grumbled as he put the ears on.

Tamaki couldn’t take her eyes off of him, as if she was trying to memorize the image for life.

“It’s your idea… that I at least should have a decency to inform Nekomata of my plan.” Itachi pointed out.

His left eye twitched, “I am pretty sure my idea is calling off the whole thing, not informing the cat that in the future your brother will come to harass him... I don’t know if you can call _that_ decency.” He took a deep breath, “Itachi, it’s not too late… just talk your brother out of the last two _cats.”_

It seemed the Uzumaki was still disagree to call Nibi a cat

Itachi gave Naruto a long stare and while his lower lip was not jutting out, his body language was giving off pouting image. “Sasuke… was very unhappy when I told him to forget about Matatabi and Nekomata…”

The twitch on Uzumaki’s eye worsened, looking decidedly unimpressed. “So your solution is going to Nekomata’s place and tells the cat to not kill your brother later?”

“No, I want to tell him to fight Sasuke with _all_ his might.” Itachi replied in serious tone. “I have to make it up to my little brother since I made him thinking I don’t believe in his strength.”

Silence…

**“You know… I always call Uchiha crazy, but not until today I can say it’s not a biased opinion in my part.”** Kurama pointed out helpfully.

“Sasuke can’t win yet but in the future he will surpass Nekomata, and me too.” Itachi added confidently and proudly.

**“It will stay a pipedream if the brat is sent to his death…”**

“After all… growth occurs when someone goes beyond their limit.”

**“Or they break, did Itachi just make a fancier term for sink or swim?”**

“Realizing that is also part of training.” Itachi finished his speech and looked hopefully at Naruto.

Naruto slapped his own forehead loudly, hard enough to leave his handprint. “You know what? There are two options.” He beamed at Itachi, but his smile belied the tone of his voice. “One… forget we ever have this conversation, return the cat ears to Neko-baa and go home to Konoha. I will even cook homemade dumpling for you.”

For a moment Itachi wavered.

“Or…” His adamantine chain materialized out of his sleeve, and their surrounding was quickly filled by music like ringing sound of the Kongou fuusa. “I will drag you to Konoha in chain and pounding some common sense back to your head!”

Itachi contemplated his options, nodding to himself before he sprinted out of the shop before Naruto’s adamantine chain could catch him. Naruto blinked owlishly at the empty spot Itachi occupied a second ago before gave a chase, roaring.

**“ITACHI! Get back here, or you will be sorry!”**

Never since she knew the Uchiha heir she imagined someone would put Itachi’s name in the same line as ‘get back here’ like he was a petulant child. She and the rest of her family poked their heads out of the door but all they could see was cloud of dust, and the Uzumaki’s scream that carried by the wind.

After a few moment Denka piped in, “Do you think Uzumaki know Itachi is leading him to Nekomata’s place -nya?”

“Uzumaki lived in an archipelago country… of course not.” Cat and sea didn’t mix.

“By the way… we just send an Uzumaki and Uchiha to Nekomata, nya.” Hina pointed out. “Do you think his fortress will be still standing by the end of the day?”

Neko-baa calculated the chance of Nekomata’s fortress surviving the two young shinobi. “Who knows… they stand a pretty good chance if they just open the door and rolled out a red carpet for them to Nekomata.”

“And that means you don’t think there would be anything left once Itachi and Uzumaki are through with Nekomata and his nin-neko army.” Denka translated.

* * *

 

It didn’t take long for them to find out as by the next day a very apologetic looking Uzumaki Naruto came back with Itachi, and apologized for running off without proper farewell. Both of them looked unruffled, even though from what Hina and Denka heard from their friends the two had run through a couple hundred nin-neko plus Nekomata himself.

As for the fortress, it was still standing. Fortunately for Nekomata –depending on how you looked at it- the cat was patrolling his territory when they ran to him, aside from half of surrounding forest uprooted and landslides, the fortress was untouched.

Nekomata came the next day to ask Neko-baa, whose insane idea to put Uzumaki and Uchiha together in a team? He also needed the Uzumaki’s address to write the boy a formal apology for calling them monsters. When asked why he wanted to apologize when usually he won’t be bothered about it, Neko-baa now knew Itachi had it in him to blow up a cliff and drop Nekomata to water for hurting the jinchuuriki’s feeling.

The very same jinchuuriki was also the one who pulled Nekomata out of water and demanded the Uchiha to make fire to help the cat boss to warm up. “He is such a forgiving child… the Uchiha in the other hand.” He shuddered. “Fighting his little brother all out or not I will return the brat in one piece.” Nekomata vowed.

Back in Konoha, Naruto proved that he takes his own words very seriously. So itachi was subjected to three hour long lectures on common sense, and how it was unacceptable to treat animal cruelly. Shisui in the other hand was thrown via Uzumaki Chain’s airlines to Uchiha’s lake for leaving him alone to deal with Itachi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well... suffice to say Naruto starts using his chakra chain Kongou Fuusa as convenient leash to keep Itachi and all of them really out of trouble.   
> He didn't succeed though.


	3. When Naruto and Itachi wonder about life and death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Naruto found out that Itachi experimented about the meaning of life with jumping off of a cliff. And Naruto revealed he was not much better considering his chronic existential crisis. And Shisui thought his funeral was a happier topic to talk about, no one agree with him.

“Naruto, what do you think about death?”

The question came out of the blue from Itachi, a very Itachi-esque question about life but it made him worried to hear his best friend talking about death. “I will ask back why this question if anyone else ask me, but it’s you so… I think death is part of life.”

“Something natural to you then…”

Naruto laughed, “You sounds disappointed by my answer, maybe you’re hoping for an answer with deeper meaning or something?” He took Itachi’s silence as yes and added. “Maa… you’re four when I was born that night so I am sure you saw that… at the night of hundreds of life ended I start my life in midst of their deaths.”

Itachi swallowed, it was foolish of him to ask such thing from Naruto who…

“I have lived for my whole life as reminder of death to Konoha, my clan utilize seal of Shinigami, and I brushed closely with dead frequently in my job… and yet I don’t think I can claim I know much about it.” His eyes softened, “So, now I have tell you what I think…may I know why you ask? Did something happen?”

“Iee… it’s just something I become curious about after I saw war with my eyes… if there is any meaning in life with war and death plaguing Shinobi world, I advanced as quickly as I could is not because I am pressured by my clan or parents… unlike what Shisui or most people thought. I just want to understand more about Shinobi but I just become more confused…”

Naruto laughed softly at that not out of mirth but the irony. “You’re more mature than I was when I was in academy for sure, when you’re wondering about the meaning of life as Shinobi I was thinking along the line ‘ _Screw it, I will take whatever life throw at me in stride’_ because finding out about my background turn my world upside down.”

“Uhm… Naruto, actually all thing considered your reaction is surprisingly mild. And now I feel silly wondering about life and death when…” You were having existential crisis at the age of six.

“I didn’t mean to make you feel bad, but Itachi… what do you think then? About death?”

“…I know as much as no one wants to actually die, whether or not there is a meaning in life. Even though war and conflict exist… as if just to snuff life out.”

Naruto became very quiet because there was something rea….ly fishy about the first part of Itachi’s sentence. “Uhm… I am almost afraid to ask, but how do you know that no one actually want to die regardless whether or not their life have meaning?”

“I tried it out, dying I mean but then I struggle to keep myself alive and not crack my head open on that riverside after I jump off of a cliff.” He said in neutral voice.  

“…Did I just hear you’re testing survival instinct with jumping off of a cliff when you’re five?”

“…”

“…Since it was when you were five, is there any point for me to get mad at you now for attempting suicide?”

“It’s not-“

“I guess we will call it misguided version of children’s curiosity which lead to unapproved experiment like one Atla and Mu…” Ah, the two Shiomitsu boys that followed Naruto around like Sasuke to him. “Attempted last week with soap, Hanabero chili and explosion tag. And I _thought_ theirs is bad…”  

“…I am sorry…”

Naruto sighed, “Itachi, as a seal master I was taught to always be open minded and endlessly seek knowledge about the world. Death and life is a very common question in my field, philosophically and scientifically. As jinchuuriki I also wonder if I am even truly alive when everyone around me wish I don’t exist, they deny my existence and the pain ironically tells me I _am_ alive since I can feel it…”

“…Naruto…” This was why between the two of them Itachi knew that Naruto was always the stronger one.  

“I don’t know what answer you’re looking for when you jumped off of that cliff, but I will tell you this… While you're alive, you need a reason for your existence. Being unable to find one is the same as being dead…”

There was so much pain in his voice that Itachi was afraid he would choke on it. Sure he had been a five years old who was questioning life and death, but Naruto had been feeling like a dead man walking since he was young because his home denied his existence. Since this person was aware of hatred, he had been questioning not about the meaning of life but whether he was alive at all.

And also because of memories he inherited from his parents, he became aware of the pain of lost but never tasted the bond fully. Sometimes Itachi wondered how he could look at the baby on the cradle indifferently the day after that night of tragedy. A baby who had been sentenced to a life of jinchuuriki by his own parents and bear the hatred of his own home.

“Is that mean you’re not afraid of death?”

Naruto let out a string of mirthless chuckle and answered. “Hm… I am sure I am afraid of death to a healthy degree as a living being.” He paused, left eye twitched. “Shut up, Kurama… I don’t care you’re disagree or not.”

Itachi sweat-dropped, considering Kurama was Naruto’s tenant obviously Naruto had been brushing too close with death too many times for the bijuu.

“I will try to stay alive as long as I could, but I am not so afraid to the point against the concept of dying like Orochimaru.” Obviously the jinchuuriki was still peeved Itachi asked about meaning of life to the Sannin of all people and tried testing his survival instinct with throwing himself off of the cliff. “I shouldn’t have been born if that’s the case, like I said death is part of life… living being will die sooner or later so what matters is how we live our life and the manner of our death…”  

“You sounds like you’re not afraid of death.”

“Not afraid is too close with not caring about it, and that means suicidal.” He said pointedly.

Itachi couldn’t help the smile that slowly formed in his lips, “So you’re not letting go about that misguided experiment of mine?”

Naruto smiled back but the smile didn’t reach his eyes, “Not anytime soon.”

Itachi chuckled at that. “Ha ha ha… Naruto, you’re really…”

“Ha ha ha…”

Suddenly Shisui poked his head between them and the younger Shinobi leaned away from him, “So… I was late to today’s training session and I found my friends talking about life and death.”

“We did.”

“I leave you guys alone and you guys talk about depressing things! I can’t believe you two!”

“What’s your problem?!”

“You two are getting too angsty! What should I do if you two become too emo, at this rate Mikoto-baasan will adopt Naruto since he can fit so well in our clan. No one can tell once we dyed that bright hair of his.”

“You get anywhere near my hair, and I will stuff you on a Nukazuke* and threw it to nearest river.” Naruto deadpanned.

“Why you always make a threat with water related death? Don’t you have enough with making crack out of my name?”

Itachi shook his head, “No, why don’t we hung him upside down above a well with Kongou Fuusa and dip Shisui like a teabag, so we can cool his head.”

“Cooling whose head? That’s called torture, Itachi you don’t even have decency to let me die with dignity.”  

Naruto and Itachi shrugged in unison, “So Shisui have dignity, news for us.”

“I swear, if I died first you two will be sobbing in my funeral in front of the whole Konoha!”

“Assuming the whole Konoha will show up in your funeral.” Naruto pointed out.

Shisui huffed, “Yeah yeah… make fun of me who don’t have your amazing verbal fencing skill.” Then he added, “But you see, with me around you we get to finish a conversation with happier note.” He puffed his chest proudly.

Itachi and Naruto shared a look. “We’re talking about your funeral, how is that happy?”

“You’re even more twisted, Shisui…”

“Shut up!”  
 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nukazuke : is a wooden bucket with lid made of wood Japanese used to ferment their pickles, think of the bucket Sound Four used to stuff Sasuke inside.   
> So... this is my way to say thanks for Itachi's filler episodes ^^  
> At least now I don't have to look for Shinden's translation anymore.  
> And also because I want to write Naruto's reaction to Itachi's attempted suicide. Which I likened to something like 'experiment' curious child did. In a twisted way, that's Itachi being a kid.  
> Naruto in the other hand is not much better, I always find his fake smile and attention seeking attitude is another twisted childish behavior. He is constantly trying to distract himself from his pain and as said in his quote from here and canon   
> "While you're alive, you need a reason for your existence. Being unable to find one is the same as being dead.' In short his dream to be a Hokage can be translated as 'being alive' to Naruto. So this is a kid who as long as he dream to be a Hokage translated as his way to live, not a wishful kind of thing kid forget once they become older.  
> Shisui is harder to point out, and I always find his decision to jump off of that cliff is weird. So you only have one eye of doom left and you decide to kill yourself so Itachi get a pair? Novel and canon seems to imply he had been close enough to teammates he lost when he was younger which is why he get his Mangekyo. Well... at this point I resign myself that I create a team of unstable kids. Then again this is Naruto universe...


	4. In which they discover KakaObi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto should keep his tendency to poke his nose where it doesn't belong, and perhaps he would never know that there was only one explanation why Hatake Kakashi Ibecome a pathological procrastinator in front of a rock for a decade.

He used to be an obnoxious child who ran his mouth carelessly, and back then it didn’t matter because people who _cared_ to listen could be counted in one hand. It irked him when his presence didn’t matter to anyone, which was why he went out his way to make himself noticeable. Even if he had to prank people six ways to Tuesday to get their attention.

After the revelation, he appreciated being unnoticeable very much because to him only few people’s acknowledgement matter and the rest could go on with their life and forgot he existed. One of most people he put in this category was Hatake Kakashi. Why? Simply because Naruto was convinced Hatake was happier if they mutually ignored each other’s private life, their relationship ended as coworkers and comrades. No emotional baggage nonsense because he was Hatake’s teacher’s son and Hatake was his father’s student.

Hatake didn’t even know he was Sekirei anyway, and Naruto prefer to keep it that way for as long as he could. Because treated as a comrade rather than reminder of the dead was what he wanted, and if inevitably the copy-nin found out Naruto supposed he should enjoy while it lasted. When Hatake did find out Naruto would leave the copy-nin to deal with his overdue emotional baggage, and turned to look sideways because he had his own problem. He had Uchiha clan and his own clan to take care of, and that was a lot of drama and angst to last a lifetime in his opinion. He didn’t need Hatake’s to add to that.

Still, curse the old habit die hard and his caring nature- _Shisui called it a disease and he agreed_ \- so inevitably he ran to a wall called Hatake Kakashi’s obsessive guilt. If he was smart, he would go home instead of stopping dead on his track when he saw Hatake in one of his -stare at memorial stone for hours- ritual. He had finished his maintenance ward duty in that training ground, he should went on his way back. Instead, he let his conscience to run over his logic so he put his Sekirei disguise and approached the Hatake.

It was raining cats and dogs, and Hatake didn’t bother to bring an umbrella or anything to shield himself from rain. If anything he heard about the pathological procrastinator was right, Hatake would stand there for three hours at least. The least he could do was telling Kakashi to go home to pick an umbrella or a raincoat first, then he could stare at Itachi’s cousin’s name as long as he could. That was the least he could do to make sure his father’s student didn’t die for something as stupid as cold.

“Ah Sekirei.” Hatake Kakashi raised his hand in greeting. "Yo." 

He skipped returning Hatake's greeting and went straight to his point. “You should really go home; you’re soaked to the bone… you know. Perhaps you should take a bath and come back when the weather is better?” He suggested.

Hatake just gave him an eye-smile before turning his attention back to memorial stone. “I know… I will be fine though, I will take a long hot bath later.” He said, eyes never left the stone.

 _'And I went out my way to tell you to take care of yourself!'_ Naruto bristled, narrowing his eyes, “You… are really fixated on _him,_ aren’t you?”

“Hm?” Kakashi hummed, “I am just remembering…”

“Iya---ya…” Naruto waved his hand dismissively, “It must be something when you become a pathological procrastinator because you stare at a name on a rock for three hours before you ever actually go anywhere… Kakashi-san.” Not to mention he never heard this guy doing this in front of Nohara Rin’s grave, or his father’s or Hatake Sakumo’s. Just to Obito, and the Uchiha didn’t even have a grave because his body was never retrieved.

“…”

“It’s like…” Naruto trailed off, trying to put his thought in word. “As if…”

**_‘He is in love?’_ **

“Ah yes.”’ At that moment he should remember to ignore Kurama’s helpful suggestion but he blurted it out before filtering it. “Like you’re in love with him.” It was too late when he realized what he just threw at Hatake Kakashi’s face.

Silence…

The copy-nin turned towards him and for a moment Naruto was worry the jounin was angry at him, but all he could see was shock in that lone exposed eye. Then much to Naruto’s horror instead of brushing off his words, the Hatake seemed to contemplate his words. Never in his life Naruto wished his words was ignored as childish nonsense said in a moment of stupidity. He also prayed there was nothing left of cynical boy his father was fondly exasperated for, because he didn’t want Hatake trying to make sense a decade’s obsession for memory of a boy that died for him. His own logic however betrayed him because now he tried to make sense of Hatake’s fixation, and normally people no matter how broken wouldn’t be obsessed on a dead comrade with their feeling stop at guilt and no more.

Then Hatake looked up from the monument then gave him a wan smile, just a curve and what could be seen from the tight mask covering his face. “Perhaps, you’re right.”

“Heh?”

The copy-nin politely ignored his yelp with staring at the rock again, and now he was caressing the name.

What had he done?!

* * *

 

**The next day**

“You may kill me now... I confess I somehow made get Hatake Kakashi to think he is in love with memory of your cousin Obito.” It was a stupid confession, but he felt so guilty he couldn't look at Itachi and Shisui on the eyes if he didn’t confess.

Itachi and Shisui had amazing shocked face and Naruto swore for a moment their Sharingan flashed. “What?!”

“To be exact I stupidly trying to make sense of why Hatake is that obsessed to stare at your cousin’s name… _for hours_ … before he go anywhere. I mean… he didn’t do that to Nohara Rin’s grave or my father’s…or his father…” At least the rumor said he was famous for standing like his namesake in front of that particular memorial stone and not anywhere else. “Then Kurama open his big mouth, and I was distracted enough to blurt it out.”

“…”

“…And Kakashi-san’s reaction?” Itachi asked warily. 

“He thought about it for a while before agreeing that perhaps I am right. I don’t know! I would be relieved if he is just humoring me and went home but **no** … he keep staring at that memorial stone! And he is caressing it!” Naruto was hysteric now. “I don’t care about him more than a comrade BUT! I don’t want to be responsible to push my father’s _last_ surviving student to a dead end!!!”

They had nothing against gay, it was not common but not something their village looked down upon. After all, with Shinobi’s life expectancy, their preference for same sex was the least of immediate concern. Still… it was their cousin _and_ Hatake Kakashi, their cousin was not even alive anymore!

Shisui stammered, “Calm down Naru… it’s not the end of the world! Even though…” He averted his eyes. “I have to agree it does make sense, I mean…” Guilt could only go so far to last for a decade and cousin Obito was not the only precious people Hatake Kakashi had lost.

“Shisui... agreeing doesn’t help anyone.” Itachi pointed out, the Uchiha heir didn’t look so well himself as he tried to wrap his mind around the possibility that Hatake Kakashi was in love with his cousin.

“Right! Don’t agree with me!” Naruto shouted, "You know what? Forget this conversation, I am sure he is just messing with me!" 

No one forgot, and they also couldn't convince themselves that Kakashi was actually messing with Naruto's head. If there was anything they were sure of, it was the fact that they won't discuss Hatake Kakashi's love life anytime soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I like this pairing and no... this isn't canon to main story Unsealing Legacy... It's just me wanting to mess with Naruto ha ha ha XDDD But well... Kakashi is obsessed with Obito for almost one and half decade.

**Author's Note:**

> Blame Shokugeki no Soma for corrupting me to write this...


End file.
